Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Only in Provo...

True life adventures in the "Happy Valley".  The following came from a news report, so I totally believe it.  KSL December 31, 2008

A Provo woman has been arrested after police say she went on a naked rampage.

Court documents obtained by the Provo Daily Herald show the 33-year-old woman broke dishes and lamps, threw neighbors' things off her balcony and turned over a birdcage on Saturday. Most of the items the woman broke were from her own home, which officers described as a "total mess." They say she also was yelling and knocking on neighbors' windows.

When officers tried to stop her, they say she bit one on the thigh.

Police say she was high on meth. They finally arrested her and booked her into the Utah County Jail on charges of resisting arrest, assault on a police officer, child abuse and disorderly conduct.

Her 6-year-old child was home at the time. He's been placed in protective custody. The bird was handed over to animal control officers.

So my questions are:
1.  What makes having a mental breakdown a "rampage"? Turning over a bird cage is a good start!
2. High on Meth.  Hello!  I guess her self esteem has never been lower.
3. Protective custody.  That's serious.  Loser should never, EVER, get that child back!!!
4.  My favorite:  The Bird! What happened to the BIRD?  Oh, swoosh!! Thank heavens for animal control officers.  I was going to cash in some frequent flyer point, fly to Provo and make sure that was taken care of.

Happy New Year's!  It couldn't be worst that "naked rampage".


  1. This is so funny. I guess even Happy Valley has its crazies. I just found your blog and am excited to read it.
    Brianne Henscheid

  2. YIKES! Sounds like my first roomate at the Y. She was crazy...