Saturday, August 22, 2009

Back in the Saddle Again

Nope, not as a cowboy, but Kindergarten teacher. Kind of the same stuff happens, alot like wrangling wild ponies. I have a long term subbing assignment while the school is hiring a teacher for a new class of 4 1/2- 5 year olds. In case you have forgotten, they are BABIES! Yikes. The first day, not so bad. They came with mommies and daddies for 1 1/2 hours. We read a story, made an art projects, sang some songs. Great!

Day 2 is when the crap hits the fan. I thought there would be more crying, whaling and gnashing of teeth, but not so much. But for these little guys, 3 pm could not come fast enough. Me too! We had to made 2 group runs to the bathrooms, learn how to line up, find our names on the table. Real tough stuff.

Day 3...."Yes, you have to come to school every day. If I am here, so are you." (direct quote) "I know you are tired, I am too." "Child A, keep your hands off of everyone." Oh, and my personal favorite, that didn't actually happen to me, but to another K teacher. Child:" You big, fat coconut head"- directed at the teacher. That child is lucky she didn't have her arm ripped off.

Day 4....I have 4 children held hostage after school so that I can tell their parents what knuckle heads they are (the parents AND their child). Most are doing much better. One not so much.
Later that night, Back-to-School Night with parents. I get to introduce myself and tell them I am only the temporary teacher. That is not a big hit. Interesting thing, once you meet the parents, you can appreciate the child, good or bad. Aaah! That's why that child is so sweet and brilliant, or...just the opposite. Poor babies.

Day 5....I called in sick. Not really sick, just out. For good reason. My baby brother got married. Yeah! And I totally needed a break from the class from hell. And no, it's not just me. My good friend substituted for me and later called to tell me that was the worst class she had ever seen in her life, and yes, something is very wrong with that child. Hearing that made me feel sane and sick to my stomach all at one. We"ll for now, off to the reception to party with my family. Photos and details of that later. Can you believe I forgot to bring a camera? Scheesh!